Mother's day

This was a fabulous weekend! I knew it would start off well because I would get to talk to my missionary.  But I was a little worried about the day of.  Mother's day last year was kind of emotional and not all of it happy.  Megan gave her farewell talk in church that day, which was wonderful and sweet and she said all kinds of great things about me which made me feel Mother's guilt because I'm positive I'm not THAT good of a mom!  But I was so proud of her.  My in-laws were here for Meg's talk, and so that made the day special too.  But Adam.  He was awful.  One of the hardest things about being around bipolar peeps is that it is so easy to base our feelings on the way they are acting or feeling.  They can sometimes say and do things that are so hurtful, yet they will argue until the day is done that they were perfectly justified in doing it.  It is hard to walk away from that.  I think that has been our hardest challenge, especially for Chad.  He takes it personally every time!  Which is easy to do.  But it doesn't help anyone!  So much easier (and healthier, really) to just chalk it up to a bipolar episode and walk away.  As sad as it is to say this, when Adam is like that, it is better to ignore him than to get into it with him.  There is no disciplining it out of him.  Its just the nature of the illness.  Ugh.

Anyway!  Adam was a totally different kid yesterday!  He was super nice to me!  Gave me a couple of hugs and said that one of the reasons that he loves me is because I have taught him the Gospel!  (tears)  He cleaned up after dinner without complaining too much!  He was nice to his siblings!  There was a moment in church, when I looked up and saw both of my sons exercising their Priesthood, and Adam smiled at me from the sacrament table, and I started to cry (more tears).  I was just so overwhelmed by a feeling of gratitude!  So blessed!  I got to talk to my beloved daughter for 4 hours!!!  She was not homesick!  There were no tears when it came time to say goodbye, because we got plenty of time together, and she was in a hurry to get ready for church, and to pick up a promising investigator.  It was a wonderful Mother's day call.  I love that kid so much and she truly is one of my besties.  Chad made me breakfast in bed and gave me earrings, and told me a million times that he loves me!  Man, he treats me so well.  And Sam and Sophie are so loving and sweet to me.  Sophie made me a super cute card and about 25 little doo-dads that she made on her Rainbow Loom.  I really felt loved all day long.  And I felt no Mother's guilt, because I earned this mother's day fair and square this year…at least with one of my kids!  Oh, it could not have been a better day.  THANK YOU, Chad, Megan, Adam, Sam, and Sophie!  And the dogs.  (Rico was glued to me all day and also snuggled up on my chest for an hour.  No he does not always do that.  Sometimes I think that dog is part human.)  

I am so thankful to be a woman.  A wife and a mother.  A daughter and a sister.  I am so thankful that the Lord blessed me with 4 wonderful children who I love more than my life!  They are all different and sometimes horrible, but they are all worth it!  Every single minute of them.  And a loving husband who spoils me.  And other mothers who set examples for me and support me.  Who listen when I need to vent and don't judge me when I am about to lose it.  I love my life and the people in it!